Wednesday, April 29, 2009


Today I had a conversation with a friend, that got me thinking. She is responsible for my "aha moment" today, so to her I say "Thank you, I needed it." As I am in a period of transition (more than I would like to be at times), it's just a reminder of how hard it is to be there. One of my favorite sayings is "if you want to make God, the universe, or whatever you refer to "it" as, laugh, tell him your plans."

One thing I have learned in my short time on this planet, is that I AM NOT IN CONTROL (and for a self-professed control freak, that's a hard pill to swallow). You mean after all the plans I have made in my life, and all the successes I have had, I am not in control? You have got to be kidding me!

No matter how hard I fight, that truth remains... I am not in control. I can only control how I prepare for and react to the occurrences in my life, the choices I make, and even the type of person I want to be, but the rest is out of my hands.

I am fortunate, I have my faith. Now, I will not sit here and lie to the world, and act like I never worry or stress out. I am only human, however, when push comes to shove (and I finally throw up my hands), from my perspective and my belief system, I can trust that God has my best interest at heart. My experience has taught me that while in man's eyes I should not be where I am, God has different plans. I have faced much uncertainty in my life, and I am wise enough to know that I will continue to, but I know that one thing has and will continue to remain constant, God is with me every step of the way.

So no, I don't know what my future holds, I don't even know if I will wake up tomorrow, or for that fact, make it to the end of the day. But either way, life will go on. I guess I say all this to leave you with this thought, and what I hope will encourage many of you (including myself).

Uncertainty is a beast, and we spend most of my life there. However, we're not completely helpless at these times in our lives. No matter where we are in life, we are always in a state of transition. So, we must have faith, hope for the best, prepare for the worst, and realize there's only so much that we can control.

1 comment:

Karen Marie said...

Ant and I were talking about that on Wednesday. Its funny how you want to control everything and that's just not the true plan. Don't worry babe, I'm right there with you. I love you!